Thursday, April 16, 2009

God Sent Me an E-mail

Last night I had a dream.

I dreamt I woke up, got out of bed, and checked my e-mail. In my dream, I was upset. My dream self felt some hurt, uncertain, and longing feelings concerning words exchanged on the internet. I opened my e-mail looking for a response to those exchanged words.

A response was in my inbox. The response was one sentence. I don't recall what the e-mail said exactly, but it was to this effect:
"Why did you have to make this about you?"
I awoke from this dream upset. In my dream, I hadn't intended to make things all about me, I was simply hurt. It took a few minutes before I even realized I had been dreaming. The e-mail wasn't real.

But was it still true? I couldn't wrap my head around why I would dream that dream. And so my day continued with occasional flashes to that dream, to that e-mail, to those feelings from that dream.

A few minutes ago, I understood that dream. For a few weeks now, I have lamented my ability to listen. Oh sure, I hear a lot of what people say, but I always chime in with words upon words. I've had this problem in a few situations with at least three different people in the past month or so.

The dream wasn't reality, but it was so true.

So, I guess God sent me an e-mail in a dream I had last night. It isn't all about me. If I start listening to people, I won't have time to make everything about me.

Thank God, family, and friends for forgiveness.

Amen.

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